baby crazy

lately...ok well for a lot longer than lately...i have wanted a baby! In actuality i have wanted more than just one more baby. Oh how i ache to snuggle my own little bitty bundle of warmth again. With that sweet smell and the wonderful noises they make. I know that unless there is a miricle out there, that for me...this will never happen again. This saddens me like i can not explain to you! And let me just say...that being unhealthy sucks! and having this decision made for you is oh so hard! and how i would give just about anything to be able to be healthy and to have another healthy baby of my own. I would take your sleepless nights, and aching feet and children fighting with each other if i could look into the face of a sweet infant of my own and watch them grow and have their own family some day. maybe, just maybe in another life i will be able to recieve the blessings of more children that those of you with families have had. until then i will love on my londy, borrow all of your babies, and be grateful for what i do have.